Preppers are a phenomena of people getting ready for the end of the world and collapse of society or at least a natural disaster. While i wouldn’t recommend befriending any such fellow i couldn’t hurt to know where the proverbial squirrel keep their nuts, just in case they get caught short on the can when the bombs drop.it must be said they have entirely the wrong end of the stick. The apocalypse isn’t about survival in of itself but the philosophical, social and psychological underpinnings that accompany it. We won’t be worried about concerns such as if we have enough beans to last the week, we’ll be spending our time contemplating if our traditional morality has any place in this brave new world in between bouts of smashing jill from next doors skull in with a baseball bat to make the nightmares go away.
Lots of games have tried to bring us round to these sort of considerations but i haven’t played them. i have a keyboard and must scream, so… fallout: new vegas? A game made from a another game but with less shooting, a smaller map, more bugs… but is somehow better. Now i know that pissed some people off, good. I wrote it mostly to wind you up but i stand by it as a seeker of objective truth. I suppose i’m expected to give a run down of the plot and then pick apart why it’s different to it’s parent game...eh.
I’ve kind of got some more pressing concerns though, with most of humanity, mad, mutated or mutilated you’d expect bum bags to be back in but no, disappointing. They're quite nifty really. I mean they just sit there right where you hands are near to and have storage and ease of access for everyday utilities. It just makes sense, i’ve seen people wearing tires on their shoulders and goat skulls on their head, they have next to no practical considerations at all. Most people choose to wear dirty clothes, no seriously it’s a choice. There is detergent and clean running water in a big ass dam nearby, why don’t they wash?
Well i’ve got some idea. You see the plot in near the dam and i’ll be damned if i mention the romans, too late i suppose. Nothing’s better at creating a breeding ground for an endless series of reboots and reimaginings than a society on the brink. In fallout land Caesar's legion is the epitome of this mindset but rather than go with a all female cast they opted for shove a hundred volts of grimdark into rome's proverbial nipples, this doesn’t need to censored because i clarifying that they are male nipples. Now they kill for no real reason, brand people needlessly and use weird contortions of logic and reason to justify a conflict that does not seem necessary once we get to the third act but is the underlying hook.
On the other hand we have NCR and their ‘president’ Aaron Kimball. On the wiki, under the heading “assistance” is reads, “helps nobody” this is telling for the entire administration. Their inability pass meaningful reforms for a nation in dire need of liberty and equality while still serving their own selfish and destructive agenda is reminiscent of anyone you don’t agree politically. There is also a man called mr house but the game told me he was de facto leader of new vegas and i refuse to recognize that a figure head can accrue power by any other means that democratically, so i don’t have to think about the role economics plays in the shaping of liberal democracies and account for the actions of politicians i have subsequently had to label as maleficent… because i am smart.
Wow, politics in a videogame. I actually found this to be a real breath of fresh air, most media tends to be strictly apolitical and objective in its focus, blah blah blah i got bored of that joke. Fallout has a survival mode. I did not use it, instead i spent my time talking to a girl called veronica, sounds abit like veruca. She has a big metal fist and likes to punch the bads, agreeable sort. I repeatedly tried to romance her because i struggle to connect with human beings. When (eventually) she took me back to her place.. for what i assumed was sex. Instead i was inducted into a remnants of the US army, i was to told to keep my sexuality to myself and given a scholarship then graduated with a major in looking fab in a suit of armor.
Highlight reel, that time i blew up a spaceship, invisible bluemen, comical photo of me attacking a merchant. Subsequent of me crouched over body with a thumbs up and smile. New vegas in the distance, screenshot of the game crashing, screenshot of downloading bugfix mods, photo of benny’s bloodied and mangled corpse being cooked by a miniature thermonuclear weapon. Subsequent photo of myself with the head of said corpse, again thumbs up. A drunken night out on the strip, sightseeing at the dam. War, war never changes.
Bonus round: Why aren't there more horses in games? I don’t know, i am really curious. Maybe they’re hard to draw.
woah, this is top kek
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